There is no light.

Remember that light I thought I saw a couple days ago? The one that I got excited about. The one I thought meant I was turning a corner. Well, it disappeared. Shortly after I wrote that blog it dimmed and dimmed, and now it's completely gone.

This week has been one for the record books as far as sickness goes. It's back to all day, every day with no breaks. I don't know if anyone else out there has been sick 24/7, but it gets really, really tiring. The days are bad, but the nights are worse. I can't make any plans to leave my house at night, and if something sounds good to eat at 1 o'clock, I can count on the fact that by the time 5 rolls around it will sound like the worst idea I've ever had.

I knew I shouldn't have gotten so excited about feeling better. I totally jinxed myself.

Kyle and I got Subway one night this week. I decided to try it again for God knows what reason. Long story short, I got halfway through it and threw up so hard I popped the blood vessels under my eyes. Neat. I won't be eating Subway again until this baby comes out. Maybe never again, who knows.

They say sickness means the baby is healthy. Well, I'm going to have the healthiest child in the world. It's funny though, I'm miserable and upset most of the time, yet somehow I am still so excited!  I cannot wait to meet this little thing that is causing so much trouble. I can't wait to see what he or she looks like. I can't wait to hold him, and even wake up in the middle of the night with him. What have I got to lose, right? I don't sleep anymore anyways.

I don't complain all the time, I promise. Just on here... because I can say whatever I want. And I want you all to feel sorry for me, ha. Don't think for a second I don't want to be pregnant though, or that I'm not enjoying all the other stuff that goes along with it - because believe me, I am. I wouldn't have it any other way. And knowing me, if I wasn't sick I'd be worried, and I think I'd rather have the sickness than the fear. 

In just a week and two days I will be out of the first trimester! That means the sickness is gone, right? Right?! That's what they tell me, and they better be right.

In other news... Hooray for Christmas!! I am SO excited for this season, sick or not - it truly is the best time of year. We will go to Poplar Bluff on Thursday morning. I'm so ready to see my parents, and dogs! My mom makes these magical little cookies called Rum Balls, and of course that was one of the first questions I asked my doctor. She told me as long as I just had a couple it should be fine - so I will be helping myself to a few and trying not to feel guilty! The baby will need a little buzz anyways if he's going to be a part of the Rossi family Christmases for a while. That's just how it goes. We also order pizza from NY every year and have it shipped - and that has got to be the BEST tradition! My mouth is watering just thinking about it. I even googled it to show Kyle just what he was in for, I can't wait to share it with him! Yum!! Besides food, I can't wait to spend time with Zoey on Christmas. Last year she was just 5 months old, so she couldn't do a whole lot. This year I am ready to watch her open presents, and grunt and point all day! And then of course there will be the watching of Christmas Vacation. A classic. Normally, my mom makes her own special version of egg nog and we all choke it down as it burns our throats and makes our eyes water, and the movie gets funnier and funnier the more glasses we have. However, this year since half of us are pregnant mom informed us she will not be making it. Darn. But I'm sure the movie will be just as good. We'll have to go to wal-mart at least 10 times with my dad, his favorite store in town. There will be a puzzle my brother in law brings that we all have to put together in a day, and me waking everyone up at 6am to open presents. Get over it, Lauren - it's still happening.  All in all... I am stoked.

There will be lots of pictures to come!
If I don't get around to writing the 12 week blog, don't worry, I'm sure nothing will change in two days and I will still be sick... so Merry Christmas!!