I first had the idea for this particular blog last Sunday when I was feeling particularly motivated. Ironically though, I never got around to writing it. And now today, probably the day in which I feel motivated the least is the day I'm sitting down to write it. Who knows, maybe I'll inspire myself.
I don't know if it's the cooler weather or what, but last weekend I got extremely motivated. Kyle and I have been kinda sorta eating healthy and kinda sorta working out since we've been married. We were both extremely good at it before the wedding, but now not so much. We keep trying to revamp it, but keep failing. So last Sunday I decided once and for all we were doing it. No more crap food because we're lazy, and no more not working out. Of course there will be exceptions - but for the most part I'm sticking to this.
Now there are a million reasons I don't exercise. Why I shouldn't exercise. I get ridiculous shin splints. I literally feel like my shins are snapping in half when I run. I usually always hurt myself somehow. My wrist is weak from surgery. I have scoliosis. I have a heart murmur. The list goes on, it's quite pathetic - but I love pulling any one of those excuses out of my bag when I don't feel like exercising. I literally hate it. I will never like it. Even when I feel good about myself I still hate the exercising. Who likes to breathe that hard? Who likes sweating? Who likes being surrounded by grunting men staring at themselves in the mirrors? Not this girl. But on Sunday, that magical day, I decided I would try my hardest to be good at it like I was before the wedding. Like I was when I was motivated. Kyle is another story. I dare say he likes working out. I will never understand it. But he's good at it. And it's probably my fault when he doesn't work out, because usually I am the one encouraging him to be lazy with me. I would gladly give him any one of my excuses. However, we flip flop when it comes to eating healthy. I LOVE it. I love knowing what I'm putting in my body, and how it will later affect me. I'm not necessarily all for organic, but I like to be healthy for a reasonable price. I feel like I have a good handle on what foods need to be organic, and what simply do not. There are foods I would never buy because of their ingredients, and I would never go cheap and buy crappy meat. I do enjoy the occasional candy bar though. Kyle is the opposite. Have you met Kyle? He has some ridiculous bond with McDonald's that will never be broken. He would eat an entire pizza by himself, and ate only chicken strips for the first 22 years of his life. Don't worry, I put a stop to that. So I guess we balance each other out. I make him eat things like potatoes, green beans, and turkey burgers, and he makes me go to the gym. Hopefully we'll stick it out longer than a week.
That's not the only way I got motivated though. I also got some serious motivation towards my job. Ever worked from home? Ha. It's tricky. Not that I just sat and watched TV all day, but I see things around the house that I need to do, and then there is facebook. Ugh. So I wrote myself up a schedule, and I've been pretty good at stickin' by it. I give myself time for facebook and house stuff, but a majority of my day is actually spent working now. Feels nice.
I've got to say, four days later and we're still going strong. Usually at day three I can tell if it will stick or not, and this time I'm liking my chances. So we'll see. I guess I better stop blogging though... that was NOT in today's schedule.
On a side note, if you've seen on facebook - I will be participating in this year's Autism Walk/Resource fair - if you would like to join me or make a donation let me know!! The more the merrier!
Thursday, September 30, 2010
Friday, September 24, 2010
Vegas Finally Came
It all started several months back. Kyle's best fried Kyle (tricky, I know) got engaged and named Kyle his best man. (I will try really hard to discern the two Kyle's). He and his wonderful, gorgeous fiance came to town for a visit and I was immediately concerned with all the details. The ring, the date, the colors, the dress, the flowers! However, the boys were immediately concerned with one thing... the bachelor party.
When my Kyle said "let's go to Vegas" - I rolled my eyes, laughed, and thought it would never happen. Low and behold, here I am sitting on the couch by myself - hoping he's still alive. Ok, not really - I trust him. I'm actually shocked at how much planning he got done, how much money he was able to part with, and how organized he was. He better give me a trip like this someday now that I know he's capable! Granted he had a lot of help from the other groomsmen, but he did his fair share.
Kyle and I are polar opposites in two ways: 1) He is a perfectionist, to the point of being OCD, and 2) he is a ridiculous planner. Everything he does is well thought out, planned, perfectly timed, organized, and all laid out. I fly by the seat of my pants. I'm am completely impulsive, and would rather not have a plan. So you can imagine how much fun we've had the last couple weeks trying to get him ready. And yes, I said couple weeks - because you know who started getting ready two weeks ago.
So it started simply with, "what should I bring to Vegas?" Of course I answered with an, "I don't know." I couldn't believe he was already thinking about it. If it was me, I would have packed it all yesterday. But I try really hard to accommodate him and his crazy antics. This question of what he should bring came up more and more frequently. Like several times a day. Then money came up. "How much money should I bring?" Good thing we had the same amount in mind, that one was easy.
So now we are at a week away. He wanted to print off his boarding pass. I told him that it was too early. He then got really angry at Southwest. Then he wanted to get money out of the bank. I told him no. He then got really angry at me. I explained to him that there was no way I was letting him carry a wallet full of cash around for over a week, and tried to assure him that the bank would not run out of money. He started getting a pile of clothes together for me to wash. Ugh. Then someone told him he needed button ups, so he got together a pile for me to iron. Ugh. Then one of them had the bright idea to bring their own alcohol, so they wouldn't have to pay for it in Vegas. So he had to plan all that of course. Finally we got to the night before, and we packed and packed and packed. Everything he needed was cleaned and ironed. He picked out exactly what clothes he would wear each day and night. Picked out just the right shoes. He had his money, he had his alcohol, he had his clothes, and he decided he would just get his ticket at the terminal. He was finished! We were finished.
I heard from him last night when he got there. He did in fact make it. I know they are two hours behind, and I know there is no way he is awake, so I will just wait patiently for a phone call. In the meantime, I learned that I am not good sleeping by myself. I could NOT fall asleep last night. And that is just not normal. When he is here I am out in 30 seconds or less, last night I tossed and turned for 30 minutes and got startled by every noise I heard. I usually yell at him for taking up the whole bed and covers. But somehow last night I wasn't comfortable not clinging to the side of the bed, and not freezing. Weird.
But don't feel sorry for me. I've got a fun weekend planned, too! Last night I went to a horse show with my good friend Vicki! It was a lot of fun! And tonight I think I'm going to Oktoberfest with Kelsey? Kelsey, are we still going? Haha. And my mom is coming for the rest of the weekend! Yay!! I guess I better go clean for her....
When my Kyle said "let's go to Vegas" - I rolled my eyes, laughed, and thought it would never happen. Low and behold, here I am sitting on the couch by myself - hoping he's still alive. Ok, not really - I trust him. I'm actually shocked at how much planning he got done, how much money he was able to part with, and how organized he was. He better give me a trip like this someday now that I know he's capable! Granted he had a lot of help from the other groomsmen, but he did his fair share.
Kyle and I are polar opposites in two ways: 1) He is a perfectionist, to the point of being OCD, and 2) he is a ridiculous planner. Everything he does is well thought out, planned, perfectly timed, organized, and all laid out. I fly by the seat of my pants. I'm am completely impulsive, and would rather not have a plan. So you can imagine how much fun we've had the last couple weeks trying to get him ready. And yes, I said couple weeks - because you know who started getting ready two weeks ago.
So it started simply with, "what should I bring to Vegas?" Of course I answered with an, "I don't know." I couldn't believe he was already thinking about it. If it was me, I would have packed it all yesterday. But I try really hard to accommodate him and his crazy antics. This question of what he should bring came up more and more frequently. Like several times a day. Then money came up. "How much money should I bring?" Good thing we had the same amount in mind, that one was easy.
So now we are at a week away. He wanted to print off his boarding pass. I told him that it was too early. He then got really angry at Southwest. Then he wanted to get money out of the bank. I told him no. He then got really angry at me. I explained to him that there was no way I was letting him carry a wallet full of cash around for over a week, and tried to assure him that the bank would not run out of money. He started getting a pile of clothes together for me to wash. Ugh. Then someone told him he needed button ups, so he got together a pile for me to iron. Ugh. Then one of them had the bright idea to bring their own alcohol, so they wouldn't have to pay for it in Vegas. So he had to plan all that of course. Finally we got to the night before, and we packed and packed and packed. Everything he needed was cleaned and ironed. He picked out exactly what clothes he would wear each day and night. Picked out just the right shoes. He had his money, he had his alcohol, he had his clothes, and he decided he would just get his ticket at the terminal. He was finished! We were finished.
I heard from him last night when he got there. He did in fact make it. I know they are two hours behind, and I know there is no way he is awake, so I will just wait patiently for a phone call. In the meantime, I learned that I am not good sleeping by myself. I could NOT fall asleep last night. And that is just not normal. When he is here I am out in 30 seconds or less, last night I tossed and turned for 30 minutes and got startled by every noise I heard. I usually yell at him for taking up the whole bed and covers. But somehow last night I wasn't comfortable not clinging to the side of the bed, and not freezing. Weird.
But don't feel sorry for me. I've got a fun weekend planned, too! Last night I went to a horse show with my good friend Vicki! It was a lot of fun! And tonight I think I'm going to Oktoberfest with Kelsey? Kelsey, are we still going? Haha. And my mom is coming for the rest of the weekend! Yay!! I guess I better go clean for her....
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
A Little Nostalgia
I am home by myself. I am sitting, and I am loving it. I worked some of the day then spent the rest of the day running around making sure Kyle gets to Vegas with everything he needs, and with clean and ironed clothes. But I promise, this is not the blog for his big trip - this trip needs a blog of its own.
So I'm sitting here being completely nostalgic. It started this afternoon when I shocked Kyle with the news that I wouldn't be at his softball games tonight. He could not believe it, and honestly I couldn't either. What did I just say to him? I don't know that I've ever just said, "Nah, I'm not going to make this one." And then I reminded him that I have been at every one of his baseball AND softball games for the last five years. Ok, not everyone, but seriously like 99% of them. And I've never just not gone, if I haven't gone there has been a reason. Tonight there is no reason. I just want to sit, at home.
So when I told him that I had been at all of them for the last 5 years - it struck me kind of funny. 1) That's a lot of games and 2) 5 years? Really? But alas, it will be in fact 5 years in October. Then I remembered how old we were. I was 18! That's shocking enough, but then I remembered that he was 19!? Freaked. Me. Out. And not just about us, where have the last 5 years gone? What have I done with my life?
So here's what I've done (semi in order): I met a boy, I carved pumpkins, I saw a scary movie, I skipped a lot of classes, I began dating a boy, I met the boys family, I met the boys friends, I became a girlfriend, I went to my first college dance, I decided I should stop skipping classes because this boy was really smart, I spent the holidays with a boy, I went to my first Blues Hockey game, I learned my dog was missing, I went to my first college baseball game, I started planning my wedding, I emailed my mom and told her I was going to marry this boy, I went to my second ever Cardinals game, I watched the World Cup, I went on a family trip with a boy, I spent my second New Years with a boy, I got to go back to NY for my Grandmas 80th birthday, I watched my sister get engaged, I became a Maid of Honor, I watched a lot more college baseball games, I got Cat Scratch Fever, I helped plan a wedding, I watched my sister get married, I bought my mom a dog, I got ready for my third holiday season with a boy, I watched a lot more Blues games, I watched a lot more college baseball games, I got ready to watch a boy graduate from college, I watched a boy graduate with Honors, I started my last year of college without a boy, I learned I was going to be an AUNT, I survived the worst teacher known to man, I had surgery on my hand, I welcomed my parents second dog to the family, I got ready for graduation, I graduated, I celebrated a 4th Christmas with a boy, I moved in with a boy and his family, I sat on a park bench and became a fiance, I started planning a wedding, I found out Zoey was going to be my niece, I became a nanny, I got my own place to live, I watched my sister have a baby (well, not all of it), I held little Zo for the first time, I spent a lot of time in Columbia, my mom bought me a big white dress, I picked out some flowers and purple dresses to match, I passed an insurance licensing test, I got ready for the 5th holiday season with a boy, I got a tattoo, I watched a boy get baptized, I got ready to become Mrs. Proebsting, I planned a trip to St. Lucia, I got a new place to live, I invited everyone to come watch us get married, I became a wife in front of all those people, I went to St. Lucia, I watched another World Cup, I learned I was going to be an aunt again, I heard Zoey say, "Hello," I started a new job, I watched Zoey take some steps, I watched a lot of football, I watched Kyle fix a chair, and I got out my sewing machine.
That's a pretty full and happy 5 years.
So I'm sitting here being completely nostalgic. It started this afternoon when I shocked Kyle with the news that I wouldn't be at his softball games tonight. He could not believe it, and honestly I couldn't either. What did I just say to him? I don't know that I've ever just said, "Nah, I'm not going to make this one." And then I reminded him that I have been at every one of his baseball AND softball games for the last five years. Ok, not everyone, but seriously like 99% of them. And I've never just not gone, if I haven't gone there has been a reason. Tonight there is no reason. I just want to sit, at home.
So when I told him that I had been at all of them for the last 5 years - it struck me kind of funny. 1) That's a lot of games and 2) 5 years? Really? But alas, it will be in fact 5 years in October. Then I remembered how old we were. I was 18! That's shocking enough, but then I remembered that he was 19!? Freaked. Me. Out. And not just about us, where have the last 5 years gone? What have I done with my life?
So here's what I've done (semi in order): I met a boy, I carved pumpkins, I saw a scary movie, I skipped a lot of classes, I began dating a boy, I met the boys family, I met the boys friends, I became a girlfriend, I went to my first college dance, I decided I should stop skipping classes because this boy was really smart, I spent the holidays with a boy, I went to my first Blues Hockey game, I learned my dog was missing, I went to my first college baseball game, I started planning my wedding, I emailed my mom and told her I was going to marry this boy, I went to my second ever Cardinals game, I watched the World Cup, I went on a family trip with a boy, I spent my second New Years with a boy, I got to go back to NY for my Grandmas 80th birthday, I watched my sister get engaged, I became a Maid of Honor, I watched a lot more college baseball games, I got Cat Scratch Fever, I helped plan a wedding, I watched my sister get married, I bought my mom a dog, I got ready for my third holiday season with a boy, I watched a lot more Blues games, I watched a lot more college baseball games, I got ready to watch a boy graduate from college, I watched a boy graduate with Honors, I started my last year of college without a boy, I learned I was going to be an AUNT, I survived the worst teacher known to man, I had surgery on my hand, I welcomed my parents second dog to the family, I got ready for graduation, I graduated, I celebrated a 4th Christmas with a boy, I moved in with a boy and his family, I sat on a park bench and became a fiance, I started planning a wedding, I found out Zoey was going to be my niece, I became a nanny, I got my own place to live, I watched my sister have a baby (well, not all of it), I held little Zo for the first time, I spent a lot of time in Columbia, my mom bought me a big white dress, I picked out some flowers and purple dresses to match, I passed an insurance licensing test, I got ready for the 5th holiday season with a boy, I got a tattoo, I watched a boy get baptized, I got ready to become Mrs. Proebsting, I planned a trip to St. Lucia, I got a new place to live, I invited everyone to come watch us get married, I became a wife in front of all those people, I went to St. Lucia, I watched another World Cup, I learned I was going to be an aunt again, I heard Zoey say, "Hello," I started a new job, I watched Zoey take some steps, I watched a lot of football, I watched Kyle fix a chair, and I got out my sewing machine.
That's a pretty full and happy 5 years.
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| First Dance |
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| A lot of Italians for Grandmas Birthday! |
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| Engaged at Niagra Falls! |
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| Trip with Kyles family |
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| The pups |
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| I could have cared less to graduate |
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| It's a Zoey!! |
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| Finally. |
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| Big sister to be - Can't wait to meet the new little one!!! |
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
We are Handy People
We Proebstings, we are handy.
Not in the sense that we could survive alone in the wilderness, build a house from scratch, or fix a broken car - but when it comes to living together... we are quite the good little married couple. I have had a blast with Kyle these last 4ish months. It's definitely different living with someone, but oh my gosh its fun! Everyone just told me how hard it was going to be, and how the first year of marriage is the hardest - I have not found that to be the case. And I probably would have been even more excited to marry him if someone would have given me a preview of how this would all go. I am here to tell you that if you find the right person... marriage is not hard, it is in fact hilarious.
It gets even funnier when you have a house to take care of. Now I didn't set out to marry a handy man. I would much rather call a professional handy man than to have someone who thinks they can fix anything themselves. I have seen one too many home projects end up spending way too much money. Lucky for me, Kyle has never seemed interested in "do it yourself" projects. I think he is fully capable, however, I am completely happy that he doesn't try. Until lately. He gets quite a kick out talking about fixing things up - I think he realized that if you fix something up you don't have to buy something knew. Lord help me. I would MUCH rather buy something new. That's just a thought he has though, he has yet to actually take on a project. Thank God.
But last night I saw him in a whole new light. He turned into quite a handy man. When we sat down to eat dinner, his chair squeaked. After grabbing it and bouncing up and down he asked me if I "heard that." Oh geez, he found a problem. There is one thing that I've always known about him... he is a perfectionist. If something is crooked, or broken, or stained, or heaven forbid squeaky, it is defective. The part where he shook his chair violently so that I would also notice its defectiveness didn't surprise me in the least. The fact that he said, "I wonder if I could fix it" did. He has never been one to fix things, especially things that require tools. We have a tool box, but if we don't need a hammer or nails it rarely gets used. So fearing what would come next, I ended the conversation with "It's finnnne."
Shew.
But then dinner ended. When I asked him to help with the dishes his attention immediately shifted back to the defective chair. He said he had to fix the chair. Wait, what?? Nooooo. Please don't try to fix something. But seeing how excited he got about fixing it made me laugh, and I actually wanted to see how this would all go. So naturally the next question from him was, "Where's the tool box?" Tool box, check. Chair flipped upside down, check. Kyle staring at it, check. So far it was going exactly how I imagined it. He diagnosed the problem to something being loose. After saying, "what is that called" "phillips?" he picked up a screw driver and went to work. And as luck would have it, he fixed it! My wonderful handy man tightened that screw right up! Of course, he had to shake it violently again and make me listen... but this time no squeak! Problem solved. Except for then he had to tip ALL the chairs upside down and see if they needed to be fixed as well. They all passed. They also passed the shake test. And there you have it, he might turn into a handy man afterall. I should also mention that he is also good at getting sliding doors back on their tracks, jiggling toilet handles, and reaching in high places for me!
So what do I do that is so handy? Well today I decided to whip out my sewing machine. Yup, I sew. I make a mean pair of pajama pants, as well as hats and pillows. I haven't used my sewing machine in years, but I have wanted to get it out for some time. It was covered in dust, but it wasn't anything a little pledge couldn't fix. I wiped it all down, stared at it for a while, and wondered if I could still make it work. It still had a thread and bobbin in it from the last time I used it, so I decided I would first take those things apart and see if I could get them back together again. I did it! It only took me an hour, but I got it all together and was ready to sew! I got an old black shirt out that I new I would never wear again and decided to see if I actually put it together the right way. Ugh, I did not. My first attempt did not go well. The stitching was all off, it was in knots, and I almost broke the needle off. I stared at it for a while and then decided to get out the manual. I found what I did wrong and tried again. It worked a little better, but still didn't look great. Another hour later and I made a straight stitch! Yes! Turns out, even with the settings right I did not thread the bobbin correctly. Rookie mistake. That shirt I used is now completely sewn shut, but it has one perfectly straight line on it! So now I am well on my way to making clothes for us. Ok, not really - but pajamas, yes. And hats. And maybe a pillow or two. And maybe somewhere far, far down the road I will attempt something real. But I'm not holding my breath.
And there you have it. We are quite the couple. With Kyle's ability to fix chairs, and my ability to make hats - there is no telling where are lives are headed! Wherever we're going though, it will most definitely be entertaining. I can't wait til we have a yard someday, then the real fun will start. We've already decided we're going to have a yard full of rocks and cacti. Surely we won't screw that up.
Not in the sense that we could survive alone in the wilderness, build a house from scratch, or fix a broken car - but when it comes to living together... we are quite the good little married couple. I have had a blast with Kyle these last 4ish months. It's definitely different living with someone, but oh my gosh its fun! Everyone just told me how hard it was going to be, and how the first year of marriage is the hardest - I have not found that to be the case. And I probably would have been even more excited to marry him if someone would have given me a preview of how this would all go. I am here to tell you that if you find the right person... marriage is not hard, it is in fact hilarious.
It gets even funnier when you have a house to take care of. Now I didn't set out to marry a handy man. I would much rather call a professional handy man than to have someone who thinks they can fix anything themselves. I have seen one too many home projects end up spending way too much money. Lucky for me, Kyle has never seemed interested in "do it yourself" projects. I think he is fully capable, however, I am completely happy that he doesn't try. Until lately. He gets quite a kick out talking about fixing things up - I think he realized that if you fix something up you don't have to buy something knew. Lord help me. I would MUCH rather buy something new. That's just a thought he has though, he has yet to actually take on a project. Thank God.
But last night I saw him in a whole new light. He turned into quite a handy man. When we sat down to eat dinner, his chair squeaked. After grabbing it and bouncing up and down he asked me if I "heard that." Oh geez, he found a problem. There is one thing that I've always known about him... he is a perfectionist. If something is crooked, or broken, or stained, or heaven forbid squeaky, it is defective. The part where he shook his chair violently so that I would also notice its defectiveness didn't surprise me in the least. The fact that he said, "I wonder if I could fix it" did. He has never been one to fix things, especially things that require tools. We have a tool box, but if we don't need a hammer or nails it rarely gets used. So fearing what would come next, I ended the conversation with "It's finnnne."
Shew.
But then dinner ended. When I asked him to help with the dishes his attention immediately shifted back to the defective chair. He said he had to fix the chair. Wait, what?? Nooooo. Please don't try to fix something. But seeing how excited he got about fixing it made me laugh, and I actually wanted to see how this would all go. So naturally the next question from him was, "Where's the tool box?" Tool box, check. Chair flipped upside down, check. Kyle staring at it, check. So far it was going exactly how I imagined it. He diagnosed the problem to something being loose. After saying, "what is that called" "phillips?" he picked up a screw driver and went to work. And as luck would have it, he fixed it! My wonderful handy man tightened that screw right up! Of course, he had to shake it violently again and make me listen... but this time no squeak! Problem solved. Except for then he had to tip ALL the chairs upside down and see if they needed to be fixed as well. They all passed. They also passed the shake test. And there you have it, he might turn into a handy man afterall. I should also mention that he is also good at getting sliding doors back on their tracks, jiggling toilet handles, and reaching in high places for me!
So what do I do that is so handy? Well today I decided to whip out my sewing machine. Yup, I sew. I make a mean pair of pajama pants, as well as hats and pillows. I haven't used my sewing machine in years, but I have wanted to get it out for some time. It was covered in dust, but it wasn't anything a little pledge couldn't fix. I wiped it all down, stared at it for a while, and wondered if I could still make it work. It still had a thread and bobbin in it from the last time I used it, so I decided I would first take those things apart and see if I could get them back together again. I did it! It only took me an hour, but I got it all together and was ready to sew! I got an old black shirt out that I new I would never wear again and decided to see if I actually put it together the right way. Ugh, I did not. My first attempt did not go well. The stitching was all off, it was in knots, and I almost broke the needle off. I stared at it for a while and then decided to get out the manual. I found what I did wrong and tried again. It worked a little better, but still didn't look great. Another hour later and I made a straight stitch! Yes! Turns out, even with the settings right I did not thread the bobbin correctly. Rookie mistake. That shirt I used is now completely sewn shut, but it has one perfectly straight line on it! So now I am well on my way to making clothes for us. Ok, not really - but pajamas, yes. And hats. And maybe a pillow or two. And maybe somewhere far, far down the road I will attempt something real. But I'm not holding my breath.
And there you have it. We are quite the couple. With Kyle's ability to fix chairs, and my ability to make hats - there is no telling where are lives are headed! Wherever we're going though, it will most definitely be entertaining. I can't wait til we have a yard someday, then the real fun will start. We've already decided we're going to have a yard full of rocks and cacti. Surely we won't screw that up.
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
Humble Beginnings
Kyle is a city kid, 100%. He attempts to duck hunt and has fun doing it, but it in no way takes away from the fact that he is a city kid. He was born and raised in St. Charles, and we live here now with no plans of leaving. So I suppose he will remain a city kid. There are very few raised trucks here, wal mart is not the only store in town, and people do not talk to you if they don't know you. Sure it's in Missouri, and compared to NYC or LA it's country - but compared to the rest of the state... it's a city.
Me? As much as I twitch when I say this I am a country girl. I didn't plan that, and I fight it as much as I can. I was not raised in this city, and as much as I love living here and being a part of this city it's not where I'm from. Where am I from? Poplar Bluff.
It's a silly little town in Southeast MO. I say that because a lot of people from here don't have a clue what or where it is. Wal-Mart is THE place to be on a Saturday, and there is no doubt you will see 100 people you know. And if you didn't do your hair or put on clean clothes because you were only going to "run in" all 100 of those people might as well be standing in a line to greet you... with an extra 50 at the end of the line. There are one million churches, with 4 million church gossips just waiting to spread the latest news. And every time I go back there is one more church because someone decided to leave a church and start their own. There is a hospital, but I don't know many people that trust it. In high school we had a "muddiest truck" competition. People stand in the middle of the street to sell newspapers. There are multiple 5-way stops; good luck figuring those out. Tractors drive down the road. There is a restaurant called The Cow Shed. People are friendly, and will talk to you about anything. Most of them have a thick accent. And I would guess that 1 in 2 people have a truck, a big truck. And on the outskirts of this crazy little town is my house. In the middle of the Mark Twain National Forest.
Kyle grew up in the suburbs. He lived on a street of perfectly lined houses with perfectly manicured lawns. I swear there are five models of houses in St. Charles, and every house has to be one of those five models. It. Drives. Me. Nuts. Especially now that we are looking at houses. I swear I will not live in a house that looks like every other house on the street.
There is not a chance of that in Poplar Bluff, more specifically, my parents have a house that no one would even dream up. When you turn off the main highway, and on to the two and a half mile gravel road... you might wonder where you are. And yes, you are in the forest. They live in the forest, the real forest. Where deer frequent the yard, and a bear stopped by my neighbors back porch. And when I say "neighbor" I use that term loosely, we are separated by acres. On top of a mountain, deep in the woods, sits my house. The driveway is gravel, and most of the time washed out, so you better give it some gas if you want to make it up. There is a huge ditch on one side, and the forest on the other... so don't do anything drastic. I have seen too many people make a costly mistake. When Poplar Bluff schools have snow days, it's because of my road. We just prepare to sit in our house for the better part of a week. There is no getting down that driveway in snow or ice. However, if you make it up the driveway you are sure to be rewarded by two of the best dogs in the world.
Kyle didn't grow up with dogs. Well, he kinda did. But he never had one for too long. But honestly, I can understand why. Here, gasp, dogs have to be on a leash! It's a law! And you have to pick up their poop! Sick. It's definitely a deterrent from having a dog. Where I grew up, however, no such rules. There may be rules, but people certainly don't follow them. Our dogs have the run of the forest! The little one is Bella. She is a black lab mix, from the pound. She is nuts, but so much fun, and regardless of what my mom says, she is a good dog! The big boy is Buddie. All 100 pounds of him. He wandered to our house almost two years ago. Absolutely starving to death. He would take a step and lay down. Hung his head low. And barely moved. We've actually kept a lot of strays in my lifetime - and he was going to be no exception. My parents fattened him up, and he has turned out to be a GREAT dog. He's so sweet and gentle. He's old though, so he's got bad knees and hips. But don't worry, they give him glucosomine haha.
So everytime I go home, I have the two of them waiting for me at the top of the mountain. After I walk inside the real fun starts. Buddie takes his huge body and leans. And you fall over. Then he sits on you. Meanwhile, Bella takes full advantage and goes to town on your ears and face. They are quite a pair - and my favorite part about going home.
Kyle has never had to use the phrase, "I'm going to town." I grew up using that phrase. And if you went to town and forgot something - it's going to have to wait until the next time you go to town. I love St. Louis, I really really do. But I like going home, too. I like the challenge of missing potholes on our road, and going to wal mart to see every variety of person I could ever imagine, and I like catching up on all the gossip, and reading the police reports to see who I know. The papers up here are just too big. In Poplar Bluff they are maybe four pages. I love getting the paper there! There is a section titled speakout... where anyone can say anything they want. I will end this with the speakout from Monday's paper when I was home. (Backgroud: I guess they tore down a house to build a parking lot for teachers at a kindergarten center, but I guess the teachers are still parking on the street).
Me? As much as I twitch when I say this I am a country girl. I didn't plan that, and I fight it as much as I can. I was not raised in this city, and as much as I love living here and being a part of this city it's not where I'm from. Where am I from? Poplar Bluff.
It's a silly little town in Southeast MO. I say that because a lot of people from here don't have a clue what or where it is. Wal-Mart is THE place to be on a Saturday, and there is no doubt you will see 100 people you know. And if you didn't do your hair or put on clean clothes because you were only going to "run in" all 100 of those people might as well be standing in a line to greet you... with an extra 50 at the end of the line. There are one million churches, with 4 million church gossips just waiting to spread the latest news. And every time I go back there is one more church because someone decided to leave a church and start their own. There is a hospital, but I don't know many people that trust it. In high school we had a "muddiest truck" competition. People stand in the middle of the street to sell newspapers. There are multiple 5-way stops; good luck figuring those out. Tractors drive down the road. There is a restaurant called The Cow Shed. People are friendly, and will talk to you about anything. Most of them have a thick accent. And I would guess that 1 in 2 people have a truck, a big truck. And on the outskirts of this crazy little town is my house. In the middle of the Mark Twain National Forest.
Kyle grew up in the suburbs. He lived on a street of perfectly lined houses with perfectly manicured lawns. I swear there are five models of houses in St. Charles, and every house has to be one of those five models. It. Drives. Me. Nuts. Especially now that we are looking at houses. I swear I will not live in a house that looks like every other house on the street.
There is not a chance of that in Poplar Bluff, more specifically, my parents have a house that no one would even dream up. When you turn off the main highway, and on to the two and a half mile gravel road... you might wonder where you are. And yes, you are in the forest. They live in the forest, the real forest. Where deer frequent the yard, and a bear stopped by my neighbors back porch. And when I say "neighbor" I use that term loosely, we are separated by acres. On top of a mountain, deep in the woods, sits my house. The driveway is gravel, and most of the time washed out, so you better give it some gas if you want to make it up. There is a huge ditch on one side, and the forest on the other... so don't do anything drastic. I have seen too many people make a costly mistake. When Poplar Bluff schools have snow days, it's because of my road. We just prepare to sit in our house for the better part of a week. There is no getting down that driveway in snow or ice. However, if you make it up the driveway you are sure to be rewarded by two of the best dogs in the world.
Kyle didn't grow up with dogs. Well, he kinda did. But he never had one for too long. But honestly, I can understand why. Here, gasp, dogs have to be on a leash! It's a law! And you have to pick up their poop! Sick. It's definitely a deterrent from having a dog. Where I grew up, however, no such rules. There may be rules, but people certainly don't follow them. Our dogs have the run of the forest! The little one is Bella. She is a black lab mix, from the pound. She is nuts, but so much fun, and regardless of what my mom says, she is a good dog! The big boy is Buddie. All 100 pounds of him. He wandered to our house almost two years ago. Absolutely starving to death. He would take a step and lay down. Hung his head low. And barely moved. We've actually kept a lot of strays in my lifetime - and he was going to be no exception. My parents fattened him up, and he has turned out to be a GREAT dog. He's so sweet and gentle. He's old though, so he's got bad knees and hips. But don't worry, they give him glucosomine haha.
So everytime I go home, I have the two of them waiting for me at the top of the mountain. After I walk inside the real fun starts. Buddie takes his huge body and leans. And you fall over. Then he sits on you. Meanwhile, Bella takes full advantage and goes to town on your ears and face. They are quite a pair - and my favorite part about going home.
Kyle has never had to use the phrase, "I'm going to town." I grew up using that phrase. And if you went to town and forgot something - it's going to have to wait until the next time you go to town. I love St. Louis, I really really do. But I like going home, too. I like the challenge of missing potholes on our road, and going to wal mart to see every variety of person I could ever imagine, and I like catching up on all the gossip, and reading the police reports to see who I know. The papers up here are just too big. In Poplar Bluff they are maybe four pages. I love getting the paper there! There is a section titled speakout... where anyone can say anything they want. I will end this with the speakout from Monday's paper when I was home. (Backgroud: I guess they tore down a house to build a parking lot for teachers at a kindergarten center, but I guess the teachers are still parking on the street).
"The lazy teachers need to get off their butts and park in the parking lot."
I love you. Poplar Bluff.
Monday, September 6, 2010
Poor Kyle
Do you ever have one of those days that you just know isn't going to end well? Today was that day. I don't know what it was; if it was something in the water, if I woke up on the wrong side of the bed, if I ate something funny. Who knows. All I know is that today started out okay, grew into something terrible, and has thankfully settled back down into okay.
This morning was fine. Kyle went out golfing, so I had the house to myself which I was pretty excited about. I got to clean, which I was also excited about. I did six loads of laundry, which I wasn't excited about doing... but I am definitely excited for clean clothes and towels. Our bathroom was embarrassing, so I can rest easy knowing we have no risk of catching hepatitis from it anymore. So really, the way the day started, you would think I would be off to a good start. Then out of nowhere... bam. Hello bad mood. Unfortunately for Kyle, it was all around the time he got home. And he was in such a good mood, too. It could have been a wonderful day, but nope, I couldn't pull it together.
I sat in silence through most of the Cardinals game, and they were even winning! Again, should've been a good day. Then when that was over it seemed like everything quickly spiraled downhill. I wanted to be in a good mood, I really, really tried. The most I could muster up was a smile, and even that was pathetic. Kyle was trying to hard to make me happy, but I wasn't having any of it. The more he tried, the more mad I got. Just shut up already, let me sulk! (Is what I wanted to say, but didn't...).
These moods don't happen very often with me. I'm usually pretty even keel, can go with the flow, pretty happy most of the time. So when they do happen, I have no idea what to do. I should really go to anger management to get some coping skills. I do have a hot temper, I admit that. I guess it's the Italian in me. I can yell and fight with the best of 'em. When I lived alone and was in a bad mood, I would just sit on my couch and be mad until I wasn't anymore. Because usually, there is no rhyme or reason to my madness... it just comes. But now, now I've got this other person to deal with. Who is trying so hard to make me better, but really I know that there is no solution. So he continues to be sweet, continues to ask what he can do, continues to tell me to smile, and I continue to fume. And fume. And fume.
We decided to get out of the house for a second. Took a trip on foot across the street to Schnucks to drop off our RedBox. I complained the whole time. I do have shin splints (which is why I shouldn't exercise, but that is a different blog entirely), but the shin splints were only half the problem. The other half was my bad mood. I just wanted to get home. Should have been a nice little walk on a nice little day... it was not.
So we get home and the fun really starts. By this time I am all over the place. I completely know that there is no reason I am in this bad of a mood, but trying my hardest to blame it all on Kyle. He shouldn't have played golf. (I really could have cared less). He should have helped me clean. (I hate when he helps me clean). Help me fold the laundry, I ask in a snotty voice. (I'm cringing watching him fold the laundry, because he's not doing it right!). Another stupid fantasy football draft. (Again, I actually could care less). Poor guy, he just sits and takes it.
Finally. It's time to cook dinner. Now, I love cooking dinner and figured if anything can change my mood... it's cooking. And we were having spaghetti after all, double good mood! Things were actually looking up for me (and Kyle)! He was upstairs putting away clothes (probably out of fear), and I was in the kitchen cooking up a storm. Meatballs, check. Sauce, check. Noodles, check. Everything looking presentable, check. One last thing... the garlic bread. Cooking nicely in the oven, all I had to do was bring the sauce to the table and I could go get the bread out of the oven and it would all be over... bad mood, peace out! However, my sauce spoon was too big for my sauce bowl. And on the trip from the kitchen to the dining room it toppled out of the bowl and onto the beige carpet, hitting just hard enough to also splatter all over the tan furniture. NOOOO!
Rage. Absolute rage was going through my head. My bad mood was on the verge of extinction, but it all came rushing back 100 times over in a matter of two seconds. So as I'm furiously scrubbing the carpet and couch, I remember the bread. On broil in the oven. Ask Kyle to take it out. He does. The smoke detector is now going off. As quiet as a mouse, he says, "It's burnt." Excuse me, what?! Things are about to get fun. So I leave my orange tinted carpet to check on the bread. I'm fuming. It's not just a little burnt. It is black. Might as well have been coal, you couldn't tell the difference. I am about to go through the roof. I know that it's always a fun story, and always cute when the new wife burns dinner. But I in no way think that's cute. I am a good cook. I rarely burn anything, and haven't burnt anything since we've been married. I HATE messing up food. Cooking has always been fun for me, and I've always been good at it.
After throwing my carpet cleaning sponge on the floor in a fit of rage, I decided to join a fearful Kyle at the table. I sobbed the entire meal. Didn't say a word. Wait, yes I did. I yelled at Kyle for eating the burnt bread. Why was he eating it?! It was disgusting. If you don't believe me, take a look at the picture... that's the other half of what he ate. I really have no idea why he ate it... he could not have been that hungry. After I finished yelling at him for eating it, I went back to being silent. And sobbing. Not because I was sad. Because I was so. freaking. mad. An awful day topped off by a miserable dinner and stained carpet. I gobbled up as much as I could, swallowing half my tears in the process. Got up from the table and began scrubbing the carpet again. I think I got it all out. But that didn't make me happy, nothing could at this point. I had to get out of the house. I decided to go for a drive. I go to get my keys and ring which are both hanging on a hook. The ring falls in the coffee pot below. Are you kidding me? I throw the coffee pot upside down to get the ring out, and I'm out the door.
I didn't know if I wanted to drive, or sit. So I decided to compromise and drive through downtown St. Charles. The speed limit is like 10, and there are shops and cars and people everywhere... so I could drive, but not fast. Within like 10 minutes of this trip I was calm. I just needed a change of scenery. I was no longer irritated with Kyle. And could finally think strait. Ahhh, my bad mood was gone! I hit rock bottom at the house, and could finally start clawing my way back up. I made the loop downtown, and started driving by the river. The river where we got engaged. I saw the park bench and smiled. There was a family on our park bench. Two boys, and two dogs. I hope that's us someday.
My poor Kyle. Most of the time I'm nice to him I promise. But there are those moments and those days when nothing he does will be right And sadly, on those days, it has nothing to do with him. He is sweet, and kind, and good, and eats my burnt bread (ughhhh), and when I said yes on the park bench I knew I was going to be a lucky girl. Unfortunately for him, I don't think he knew the extent of my temper or he might not have asked! He learned tonight. Poor guy.
When I got home from my drive, I walked inside. It was completely dark. No tv, no computer, no Kyle. Now when I left the tv was on, the lights were on, and he was sitting at the computer working on his draft. I thought I was done. I thought he saw my temper and was outta here! I actually stepped back outside to see if his car was in the parking lot. It was. Ok, he has to be somewhere. He was upstairs. On the other computer doing his draft. Shew. He's stickin' it out.
Praise Jesus this day is almost over. The hard part is at least. My terrible mood is gone, dinner is over, I am calm, and I think if I'm nice enough he will let me sit with him on the couch. I'm going to go try. Wish me luck!
This morning was fine. Kyle went out golfing, so I had the house to myself which I was pretty excited about. I got to clean, which I was also excited about. I did six loads of laundry, which I wasn't excited about doing... but I am definitely excited for clean clothes and towels. Our bathroom was embarrassing, so I can rest easy knowing we have no risk of catching hepatitis from it anymore. So really, the way the day started, you would think I would be off to a good start. Then out of nowhere... bam. Hello bad mood. Unfortunately for Kyle, it was all around the time he got home. And he was in such a good mood, too. It could have been a wonderful day, but nope, I couldn't pull it together.
I sat in silence through most of the Cardinals game, and they were even winning! Again, should've been a good day. Then when that was over it seemed like everything quickly spiraled downhill. I wanted to be in a good mood, I really, really tried. The most I could muster up was a smile, and even that was pathetic. Kyle was trying to hard to make me happy, but I wasn't having any of it. The more he tried, the more mad I got. Just shut up already, let me sulk! (Is what I wanted to say, but didn't...).
These moods don't happen very often with me. I'm usually pretty even keel, can go with the flow, pretty happy most of the time. So when they do happen, I have no idea what to do. I should really go to anger management to get some coping skills. I do have a hot temper, I admit that. I guess it's the Italian in me. I can yell and fight with the best of 'em. When I lived alone and was in a bad mood, I would just sit on my couch and be mad until I wasn't anymore. Because usually, there is no rhyme or reason to my madness... it just comes. But now, now I've got this other person to deal with. Who is trying so hard to make me better, but really I know that there is no solution. So he continues to be sweet, continues to ask what he can do, continues to tell me to smile, and I continue to fume. And fume. And fume.
We decided to get out of the house for a second. Took a trip on foot across the street to Schnucks to drop off our RedBox. I complained the whole time. I do have shin splints (which is why I shouldn't exercise, but that is a different blog entirely), but the shin splints were only half the problem. The other half was my bad mood. I just wanted to get home. Should have been a nice little walk on a nice little day... it was not.
So we get home and the fun really starts. By this time I am all over the place. I completely know that there is no reason I am in this bad of a mood, but trying my hardest to blame it all on Kyle. He shouldn't have played golf. (I really could have cared less). He should have helped me clean. (I hate when he helps me clean). Help me fold the laundry, I ask in a snotty voice. (I'm cringing watching him fold the laundry, because he's not doing it right!). Another stupid fantasy football draft. (Again, I actually could care less). Poor guy, he just sits and takes it.
Finally. It's time to cook dinner. Now, I love cooking dinner and figured if anything can change my mood... it's cooking. And we were having spaghetti after all, double good mood! Things were actually looking up for me (and Kyle)! He was upstairs putting away clothes (probably out of fear), and I was in the kitchen cooking up a storm. Meatballs, check. Sauce, check. Noodles, check. Everything looking presentable, check. One last thing... the garlic bread. Cooking nicely in the oven, all I had to do was bring the sauce to the table and I could go get the bread out of the oven and it would all be over... bad mood, peace out! However, my sauce spoon was too big for my sauce bowl. And on the trip from the kitchen to the dining room it toppled out of the bowl and onto the beige carpet, hitting just hard enough to also splatter all over the tan furniture. NOOOO!
Rage. Absolute rage was going through my head. My bad mood was on the verge of extinction, but it all came rushing back 100 times over in a matter of two seconds. So as I'm furiously scrubbing the carpet and couch, I remember the bread. On broil in the oven. Ask Kyle to take it out. He does. The smoke detector is now going off. As quiet as a mouse, he says, "It's burnt." Excuse me, what?! Things are about to get fun. So I leave my orange tinted carpet to check on the bread. I'm fuming. It's not just a little burnt. It is black. Might as well have been coal, you couldn't tell the difference. I am about to go through the roof. I know that it's always a fun story, and always cute when the new wife burns dinner. But I in no way think that's cute. I am a good cook. I rarely burn anything, and haven't burnt anything since we've been married. I HATE messing up food. Cooking has always been fun for me, and I've always been good at it.
I didn't know if I wanted to drive, or sit. So I decided to compromise and drive through downtown St. Charles. The speed limit is like 10, and there are shops and cars and people everywhere... so I could drive, but not fast. Within like 10 minutes of this trip I was calm. I just needed a change of scenery. I was no longer irritated with Kyle. And could finally think strait. Ahhh, my bad mood was gone! I hit rock bottom at the house, and could finally start clawing my way back up. I made the loop downtown, and started driving by the river. The river where we got engaged. I saw the park bench and smiled. There was a family on our park bench. Two boys, and two dogs. I hope that's us someday.
My poor Kyle. Most of the time I'm nice to him I promise. But there are those moments and those days when nothing he does will be right And sadly, on those days, it has nothing to do with him. He is sweet, and kind, and good, and eats my burnt bread (ughhhh), and when I said yes on the park bench I knew I was going to be a lucky girl. Unfortunately for him, I don't think he knew the extent of my temper or he might not have asked! He learned tonight. Poor guy.
When I got home from my drive, I walked inside. It was completely dark. No tv, no computer, no Kyle. Now when I left the tv was on, the lights were on, and he was sitting at the computer working on his draft. I thought I was done. I thought he saw my temper and was outta here! I actually stepped back outside to see if his car was in the parking lot. It was. Ok, he has to be somewhere. He was upstairs. On the other computer doing his draft. Shew. He's stickin' it out.
Praise Jesus this day is almost over. The hard part is at least. My terrible mood is gone, dinner is over, I am calm, and I think if I'm nice enough he will let me sit with him on the couch. I'm going to go try. Wish me luck!
Friday, September 3, 2010
The Lizard
Dear Zoey,
This is your Aunt Mimi, creating a special blog just for you!
Do you even know how cute you? Well let me tell you. You are the cutest, most precious little person in this entire world. You make your Mimi feel dumb every time your mother posts pictures of you because suddenly all of my vocabulary goes out the window. All I can seem to come up with is: Sooo cute, she's so cute, so stinking cute, oh. my goodness. how cute!, how cute is she, she is so beautiful. I mean really, I am getting quite redundant when it comes to describing you. Someone needs to come up with a word just for you, that means more and describes more than "cute" or "beautiful" ever could. You are definitely in your own league when it comes to babies. And that's just looks! Don't even get me started on your personality! Could there be a happier, funnier, more pleasant child in this entire world?? I think not. You are everything good and right in this world.
Now if you don't mind, I'm going to get a little sappy on you. Because frankly, if there is one thing in this world that makes me a pile of mush... it's you. I don't know how you do it. Not many people can. Your uncle is another one, but this blog is all about you so we will leave him out of it! When I found out you were going to be a girl, I must admit I was a little sad. There are sooo many girls in our family, and I thought I boy would be such a nice change! Boy was I wrong. Had I only known how perfect of a little girl you would be - I never for a second would have been sad. You are simply breathtaking. And your Mimi has never used that word. You are perfect beyond measure, and I don't know what I would do if you were not in my life. I have never been more grateful for your mom OR dad because they gave the world you! And you are a blessing to everyone you have ever met. You light up a room with just your smile, and you have the power to captivate an audience just by sticking out your tongue. You exude cuteness, and put all of your friends to shame. I don't think someone could dream up a little girl as wonderful as you. Talk about a little piece of Heaven. Kid, you're it.
Now, your momma is having another baby. And I'm a little worried about finding space left in my heart to love him. I call "him" a him for your mom's sake. She's loving the thought of giving you a brother. However, I learned the last time that whomever God gives us will be better than any of us could dream up. Boy or girl. But back to your "brother." They say you find the space, but I just don't know if it's possible. You've got it all, little one. I promise I will love Jonah, but you have your Mimi's heart.
I can't wait to watch you grow up. Today there is a video of you walking. Are you serious? When did you get so big?? I can't wait for your first day of Kindergarten - you will be the teachers favorite, I guarantee it. I can't wait until you start getting into activities. What do you think you'll like? Gymnastics, girl scouts, soccer? Your mom tried soccer once... yikes. Whatever you choose to do, I will be there making a fool of myself letting everyone know that I am the lucky one that gets to be your Aunt! Now lets take a minute to talk about boys. I can tell you right now, there isn't one out there good enough for you. Sorry. You might as well not even bother looking. It'll be a waste of time. Ok, that's a lie. There will be someone for you - and he will be wonderful I'm sure. But man, is he going to have a hard time. First, he's got to get through your daddy. Then your uncle Kyle. Then your GRANDPA. Ha - ask your dad about grandpa someday. The thing is, in our eyes you are perfect. Therefore, no one will be good enough to date you. Sorry. We've got some time though, we'll try to work on it.
I've got big dreams for you, little girl. And I can't wait to watch you conquer them one by one. Will you do me a favor though? Will you give animals another chance? Aunt Mimi and Aunt Vicki would really love to play with animals with you. I know your mom makes dirty faces at them, but ignore her. She just thinks they're dirty. Weirdo. Uncle Kyle and I can't wait to make a Cardinals fan out of you! I know they are embarrassing right now, but I promise a lot of the time they're good! Sometimes they even win! Man, we can't wait to take you to a game. You can have anything you want while we're there. Just don't tell your uncle. I hate that we don't live in the same city, but you can come and see us anytime you want! I asked your mom which month was good for her, but she hasn't given me an answer yet...
Well booger, I could write and write all day - but I would just start getting redundant. You make your Mimi speechless. I am so very proud of everything you do, and that will never change! I pray for you everyday, too, and that won't ever change either. I pray that you will always be healthy and strong. That you will feel love every day of your life. I pray that you will never be alone. That you will enjoy life. That you will realize someday how very special you are, and that you would know the God that created you that way. I pray that you are never sad, but I know that one is a stretch - so to that prayer I attach that when you are sad you will know that you can always, always, turn to your momma, daddy, grandma, grandpa, oma, opa, aunt Anna or uncle David, or your Mimi or uncle Kyle. It can be tough out there, but we've all got your back.
Now, just work on the animal thing for me. Or not. It really doesn't matter what you do, I will love you no matter what.
This is your Aunt Mimi, creating a special blog just for you!
Do you even know how cute you? Well let me tell you. You are the cutest, most precious little person in this entire world. You make your Mimi feel dumb every time your mother posts pictures of you because suddenly all of my vocabulary goes out the window. All I can seem to come up with is: Sooo cute, she's so cute, so stinking cute, oh. my goodness. how cute!, how cute is she, she is so beautiful. I mean really, I am getting quite redundant when it comes to describing you. Someone needs to come up with a word just for you, that means more and describes more than "cute" or "beautiful" ever could. You are definitely in your own league when it comes to babies. And that's just looks! Don't even get me started on your personality! Could there be a happier, funnier, more pleasant child in this entire world?? I think not. You are everything good and right in this world.
Now if you don't mind, I'm going to get a little sappy on you. Because frankly, if there is one thing in this world that makes me a pile of mush... it's you. I don't know how you do it. Not many people can. Your uncle is another one, but this blog is all about you so we will leave him out of it! When I found out you were going to be a girl, I must admit I was a little sad. There are sooo many girls in our family, and I thought I boy would be such a nice change! Boy was I wrong. Had I only known how perfect of a little girl you would be - I never for a second would have been sad. You are simply breathtaking. And your Mimi has never used that word. You are perfect beyond measure, and I don't know what I would do if you were not in my life. I have never been more grateful for your mom OR dad because they gave the world you! And you are a blessing to everyone you have ever met. You light up a room with just your smile, and you have the power to captivate an audience just by sticking out your tongue. You exude cuteness, and put all of your friends to shame. I don't think someone could dream up a little girl as wonderful as you. Talk about a little piece of Heaven. Kid, you're it.
Now, your momma is having another baby. And I'm a little worried about finding space left in my heart to love him. I call "him" a him for your mom's sake. She's loving the thought of giving you a brother. However, I learned the last time that whomever God gives us will be better than any of us could dream up. Boy or girl. But back to your "brother." They say you find the space, but I just don't know if it's possible. You've got it all, little one. I promise I will love Jonah, but you have your Mimi's heart.
I can't wait to watch you grow up. Today there is a video of you walking. Are you serious? When did you get so big?? I can't wait for your first day of Kindergarten - you will be the teachers favorite, I guarantee it. I can't wait until you start getting into activities. What do you think you'll like? Gymnastics, girl scouts, soccer? Your mom tried soccer once... yikes. Whatever you choose to do, I will be there making a fool of myself letting everyone know that I am the lucky one that gets to be your Aunt! Now lets take a minute to talk about boys. I can tell you right now, there isn't one out there good enough for you. Sorry. You might as well not even bother looking. It'll be a waste of time. Ok, that's a lie. There will be someone for you - and he will be wonderful I'm sure. But man, is he going to have a hard time. First, he's got to get through your daddy. Then your uncle Kyle. Then your GRANDPA. Ha - ask your dad about grandpa someday. The thing is, in our eyes you are perfect. Therefore, no one will be good enough to date you. Sorry. We've got some time though, we'll try to work on it.
I've got big dreams for you, little girl. And I can't wait to watch you conquer them one by one. Will you do me a favor though? Will you give animals another chance? Aunt Mimi and Aunt Vicki would really love to play with animals with you. I know your mom makes dirty faces at them, but ignore her. She just thinks they're dirty. Weirdo. Uncle Kyle and I can't wait to make a Cardinals fan out of you! I know they are embarrassing right now, but I promise a lot of the time they're good! Sometimes they even win! Man, we can't wait to take you to a game. You can have anything you want while we're there. Just don't tell your uncle. I hate that we don't live in the same city, but you can come and see us anytime you want! I asked your mom which month was good for her, but she hasn't given me an answer yet...
Well booger, I could write and write all day - but I would just start getting redundant. You make your Mimi speechless. I am so very proud of everything you do, and that will never change! I pray for you everyday, too, and that won't ever change either. I pray that you will always be healthy and strong. That you will feel love every day of your life. I pray that you will never be alone. That you will enjoy life. That you will realize someday how very special you are, and that you would know the God that created you that way. I pray that you are never sad, but I know that one is a stretch - so to that prayer I attach that when you are sad you will know that you can always, always, turn to your momma, daddy, grandma, grandpa, oma, opa, aunt Anna or uncle David, or your Mimi or uncle Kyle. It can be tough out there, but we've all got your back.
Now, just work on the animal thing for me. Or not. It really doesn't matter what you do, I will love you no matter what.
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
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