Brown Bear, Brown Bear.

We’re about to enter week 16 of having this little bug around, and she is making the most out of every single day!

We survived (barely) another growth spurt last week. Seriously, stop it with the growing! There wasn’t supposed to be another one until six months, but Leah does what she wants, when she wants. It had all of the typical symptoms. No sleep, crabby, fussy eater, me in tears, same ol, same ol. But the day it was over, she slept for six hours during the day! I didn’t even know what to do with myself and all of the time I had. Since the beginning of time (Leah’s time), the longest nap I have ever, ever gotten from her had been two hours. The day she finished up her growing she gave me a three hour nap! Three consecutive hours – it was crazy. So what did I do? Sat on my butt. These growth spurts of hers are no joke. They wear me out. I have zero energy, and get zero sleep. By the time she is finished, I am at my limit. Usually, she ends with a full night of sleep. This time she gave me and full day and full night of sleep. It almost made the whole thing worth it. 

Almost.

Now I’ve got this even bigger “three month old.” I use the quotations, because three months is just a label in our household. No one is being fooled; Leah is not three months old. She doesn’t sleep like a three month old, she doesn’t wear three month old clothes, she doesn’t take a bath like a three month old, and she certainly doesn’t act like they tell me three month olds act. Lately, I’ve been figuring out some things she likes and doesn’t like. Her personality shines through a little more every day and I feel like I can really tell what makes her happy… and what does not. For instance, she loves the book Brown Bear Brown Bear, What Do You See? She kicks her legs in excitement when we start, and her eyes go back and forth so fast like she’s trying so hard to take it all in before I turn the page! Everytime I do turn the page, however, she gets excited all over again and her legs go crazy. It’s so fun to watch! It almost looks like she’s reading right along with me; and knowing Leah, she probably is. It also makes me really happy that she likes books. I love reading to kids, and now I’ve got one of my own to read to! Also, I think she hates (maybe not hates, but doesn’t like) musical toys. Obviously, she has toys meant for babies that make all kinds of noise and play all kinds of little jingles. And after observing her with these toys, I think they stress her out. She gets fussy pretty quick if they’re left on for any length of time. This is not to be confused with music, however. She seems to love regular music. Kyle played some Rolling Stones, Paint it Black for us the other day and she went crazy. She also seems to like Casting Crowns and Aerosmith. This can only mean one thing: she is far too advanced for baby music. She needs rock and roll. She also likes to be sung too. Not that I can carry any sort of tune, but she sure does smile when I sing to her. It doesn’t matter the song, either. Itsy Bitsy Spider, Amazing Grace, Teenage Dream… she doesn’t have a preference, ha. She loves to be outside. If she’s being a crab, or we’re just bored – taking her outside cures all. She looks around nonstop, and as long as she’s upright we can stay outside for hours! She doesn’t sleep on the weekends. And here’s why – she knows her dad is home. I’ve been building this theory for a while, but I’m convinced. It is so hard to get her to take a nap on the weekends (more so than normal)! I guess she can smell him or something. It’s so ridiculous, and cute. This past Sunday I tried for thirty minutes to get her to close her eyes, then Kyle tried for another 15… she didn’t even pretend to close her eyes. So he brought her downstairs, set her on his lap facing the TV, and they watched football together. Leah had the sweetest little grin on her face, like she got just what she wanted. Sometimes she’s just too much for me. She loves to look at herself in the mirror!! Her biggest, brightest, and best smiles all come when she’s looking in the mirror. It’s the sweetest thing. She talks to herself, too. Anytime I need a pick me up I take her to a mirror and let her go crazy. It’s an instant good mood for both of us. She has regressed in the car. We can’t get a minute down the road anymore. But it’s not because she hates the car or her carseat necessarily. She hates that she is left all alone in the backseat. If one of us rides back there with her she is perfectly fine. She laughs and talks the entire time. It’s pretty ridiculous really.

Leah newest trick is reaching for toys. Just as of this morning, actually! She can now grab at her favorite toy, her string of colored rings! And she will only grab at things with her left hand. I think maybe she’s gonna be left handed like her mama! She has slowed some with the rolling. Now when she is on her belly she tries to pull her knees up under her belly… on to crawling. This child is out of control. Also if I sit her up on the floor she can hold herself up for a couple of seconds. I think it’s only a matter of time before she is sitting up like a big kid.

That’s about it – she is growing and developing by leaps and bounds. I already can’t keep up with her.

I will leave you with maybe my favorite conversation thus far. And it really wasn’t a conversation at all. It was a one man show put on by Kyle.

Scene: Leah has decided she doesn’t need to sleep. It was 1am, and she had been up for two hours. Smiling, talking, laughing, flailing about. Because it was a weekend, and I had growth spurt duty the week before… she was all Kyle’s. He was getting increasingly frustrated. Obviously, I was not sleeping, but lying there watching the two of them battle. Naturally, when he laid her on our bed she spit up all over herself and our bed. He went to get her new pj’s, even more frustrated. As he was changing her:

Kyle: (fighting with her kicking legs) Put your foot in the hole.

Kyle: Ugh, Leah put your foot in there!

Kyle: (to me) What are these, spandex?!

Kyle: Leah!

Kyle: (to me) Why are you buying her spandex clothes?!

Leah: Staring at him.

Me: Cracking up.

I did feel bad for him, but I go through that routine all too often so it was kinda fun to watch.

Pregnant.

No, I'm not pregnant you crazies.

One year ago today I saw this:

Scary!

And life was forever changed.

I wish I could see myself today the day I took that test. Although it was exciting, that day was terrifying. We were not planning on a Leah bug, but of course, she has always had a mind of her own. I wish I would have known that day that everything would turn out fine. I wish I could’ve seen a little into the future and gotten a glimpse into just how happy I would be pregnant. I wish I could’ve seen myself today laughing and playing with this sweet baby girl on the floor. We were pretty nervous a year ago today, if only we had known just how wonderful our lives were about to become. I started thinking about my biggest fears of that day, and I’m so grateful that none of them came to fruition. I’ll share them with you anyways though; I like to remind myself how blessed we have been with the entire pregnancy and now our bug.

      
     That I would miscarry. Oh my goodness, I tortured myself with this one from day one. I was so careful to follow all of the ridiculous rules, knowing that if I neglected even one of them something terrible would happen. Sure, we didn’t plan on Leah, but the second I knew someone was in there I did everything possible to keep it alive. This one never went away. Even in the end I began to worry that something would happen. It was awful. I never talked about it, either. I just knew that by vocalizing my fear, I would jinx everything. I wish I would have let myself rest a little; have a little more fun with her. If only I had known that she would be just fine, more than fine, really. She came out bigger and better than anything I had hoped – fear, released.

     
     That we would go bankrupt. Okay, not really bankrupt, but I was pretty sure we would have to spend more money than normal. This was more a fear of Kyle’s, but I did my fair share of worrying. Just how much would she actually cost us? What would we have to sacrifice? I wish I had realized just how blessed we are with family and friends who were more than willing to give us (and Leah) presents to get us started. Here we are a year later, and we are not bankrupt. We’re not even struggling. We are able to feed ourselves, have cable, AND buy Leah pretty dresses. We might have to sacrifice a few things here and there, but no one in the Proebsting household is suffering. God is faithful.

            
     That my body would never be the same. Alright, it’s not. It’s better! Ha. For some reason I was terrified of the fact that I would get and stay the size of a walrus. This may have actually helped me out – you see, because of this fear I made sure to eat extra healthy and only indulge on certain occasions. I watched my salt and sugar intake like a hawk. I drank only water, and a lot of it. I also knew that I wanted to feed Leah as best I could which ended in me gaining the ideal amount of weight and losing it all within a month – and then some! I’m officially the skinniest I’ve been since I started weighing myself… in high school. I’m diggin’ the Leah diet. Now if only I had time to exercise…

     
     That Leah wouldn’t be healthy. This one kind of goes along with the miscarry one. I worried so much that something would be wrong with her. I just wanted her to be healthy. I had to make myself stop googling, I was finding out more about what could go wrong with babies than I ever wanted to know. Genetic disorders, heart defects, missing chromosomes; it’s a wonder anyone has a healthy baby! But again, I wish I would have let myself relax. I did have the mindset that if something was wrong obviously I would love her no matter what – but I desperately didn’t want things to come to that. Well, we are blessed. Not only is Leah healthy, sometimes I think she is a little too healthy. She is absolutely thriving.

           
     That Leah wouldn’t be cute. Let’s just get real – no one wants an ugly baby. No one gets pregnant and says, “oh my goodness, I hope he’s straggly looking!” I would be lying if I told you I didn’t want a cute baby – of course I did! I wanted things proportional. I wanted two legs and arms. I wanted pretty eyes and chubby cheeks. I didn’t want the, “oh isn’t she special” response when people saw her, I wanted the “oh how cute!” response! And they may be lying, but I get the cute response a lot! We might just think she’s cute because she’s ours, but that’s okay with me. She’s cute in her mama’s eyes. She’s got the cheeks, and button nose, the pretty eyes, the two legs and arms, and the smile that lights up my whole day. Fear absolutely abolished.

And now back to the changes… I really had no idea how it would all change. They say having a baby changes everything, but there’s no way to really grasp that concept. Everything? Really, everything? What does that mean exactly? Well, I can tell you that a year later and yep, everything has changed. Everything. There is really no way to fully understand that, but I’ll highlight some of the biggest:

·         Sleep: Duh. Leah generally sleeps great at night, don’t get me wrong. But even sleeping “great” means I wake up at least once in the middle of the night and am up for at least 30 minutes.

·         Our social life, or what’s left of it, revolves around bedtime. Which is now 7:30. Parrrty.

·         I rarely listen to the radio for two reasons – 1)I rarely drive anywhere and 2) when I do Leah and I rock out to Rainforest Lullabies

·         There’s a lot more laundry. And missing socks is even more frustrating when the socks are the size of my pinky.

·         I’ve learned to take a shower in two minutes flat.

·         Kyle plays a lot less golf.

·         When I leave my house (if I leave my house) and how long I can be gone all depends on a 3 month old.

·         Johnson and Johnson have taken up residence in our bathroom.

·         Getting out the door on time means starting to get out the door twenty minutes earlier.

·         We rarely watch a show in its live timeslot, and our DVR is flooded

·         I’ve declared war on the Ice Cream man, who wakes Leah up with his obnoxious music everytime he drives by our place.

And there are a million more; it would take me days to list them.

Sometimes I think I’m still pregnant. Nine months is a long time to get used to living a certain way! For instance, if something hits my stomach hard, and even if Leah herself kicks it I have a momentary freak out of, “oh my gosh, the baby will have brain damage!” Every once in a while I feel flutters in my belly. I’m sure they were there before I got pregnant, and I’m sure they are normal, but my first instinct is to think that it’s Leah moving around. And then I get really sad that it’s not. I’ve found myself readjusting my seatbelt on occasion, so it’s not right on my stomach. After all, I don’t want to squish the baby not living in my belly anymore. And my personal favorite: Do you shop at Aldi? Or maybe it’s every grocery store. But do you know the ridges that are in the doorways? When the cart goes over them they make a lot of noise? Anyways, Aldi has them for sure, and if you have no idea what I’m talking about – follow along anyways. When I was pregnant, especially in the last months, when I would push the cart over the ridges I would get kicked so.hard. I learned to brace myself as I went over them, and even try not to make “too much” noise. Leah was either scared or excited that I was buying food. But something caught her attention and I got a beating. The pain of those kicks in particular has stayed with me. I continue to brace myself by instinct everytime I go over them! I just know I’m going to get kicked. And then I don’t, and I’m both relieved and sad.

Being pregnant was hands down the best experience of my life. I’ve said it a million times. Sometimes I wish I could just shove Leah back in there. She was much easier to contain in there! Someday I suppose I’ll get the experience back again – until then, I have the result of a very scary pregnancy test to keep me more than occupied!

She's on a Roll!

Pun absolutely intended.

Who gave my child Wheaties? Seriously, who did it?

There really should be a word between baby and toddler. I know for a fact that I do not have a baby on my hands. And I also know that although she is inching closer everyday, she is not quite a toddler. She is something of her own – boddler, taby? I don’t know what I have exactly, maybe I’ll never know, but I sure do like her.

I know I say every week “look at how many new and exciting things Leah can do!” But seriously, this week… she topped them all. In a span of about three days Leah tackled huge milestones one by one. It was crazy to watch. First things first, we have a roller! A rollie pollie bug if you will. She finally got what she’s always wanted – she told her shoulder what was what and she was off to the races! Freedom! She can now move about as she pleases, until of course she rolls into something. She is such a strong little thing! I had a feeling I was carrying a stronger than average child when I was pregnant. However, being my first pregnancy I had no idea. I had nothing to compare her to. The only thing I had were the emails (again with the emails), telling me when she should be doing what. They told me that I should feel her kick between 18 and 22 weeks. I felt her at 14. They told me Kyle could feel her starting around 24. He felt her at 17. They told me there would be around 20 minutes of activity from her then a rest period of a couple hours. I never got the rest period. Ever. And towards the end I would involuntarily yelp out in pain because of some kick, jab, or head butt from her. And now I have her on the outside, and nothing has changed. She picked her head up off my chest and held it up for several seconds the morning after she was born. She kicks me hard enough to hurt me. And now she is rolling at just three months. I’m done being surprised by her. If she is crawling next week I don’t think it will phase me in the least. My favorite part about her rolling is when I set her down, walk to the kitchen, come back, and find her in a completely different spot and looking ever so proud of herself. But now onto milestone number two. No more swaddles, ever. She did it – she has aced sleeping without a swaddle. Up until she started rolling, we were still swaddling at night. I was terrified of how she would sleep during the night without being swaddled. And frankly, I like to sleep. I was fully prepared to keep swaddling at night for a while longer. However, when she rolled I knew it had to go. I was so scared that first night. She fell asleep great, but I just knew she would wake up every 30 minutes. But when did she wake up? 5am. Five AM! She slept from eight to five people. Nine hours of uninterrupted sleep. I was beside myself excited… and worried. I actually went to check on her at 4am; I had to make sure she was still breathing. The nights that followed I remained nervous that it was just a fluke and horrible sleep was in our future, but she followed that night up with two 8-4’s and an 8-3. I can live with all of that. I need to stop doubting her. Milestone number three is a fun one. I gave her a toy one more last week and she put it right in her mouth! Yay for hand eye (mouth?) coordination! Kyle was a little worried about that one, if she’s going to be an athlete, she needs to not have inherited my coordination. But I think there is hope for her after all! I just like it because it means her hands aren’t always in her mouth! She’ll usually drop the toy then go back to her hands, but with a little more practice I’m hoping she ditches the hands all together! And milestone number four – I’m not sure if this is a “milestone” but it’s something. I had to pack up all of her three month jammies with feet. She’s just too long. She’s wearing six month footie jammies now. I actually had to go get her a few more. I figured I still had some more time with our three month stuff, but that’s just not the case. She’s going to be a tall one.

My favorite time with Leah these days is bedtime. It’s kind of fun to have a sleepy baby. (Is this what everyone else gets to experience)? Her bathtime is just a ridiculous event, and her new duck tub gives her even more room to kick and splash like some sort of fish. After her bath though, she knows it’s time to wind down. We lather her up with lotion, put her in some fresh jammies, she gets a little snack and then it’s off to the rockin’ chair where she just melts in my arms. Some nights I don’t want to put her in her crib, I feel like I could just rock her for hours. It’s much different to rock her at night than it is during the day. She smells so yummy, and she’s actually cuddly, something she is definitely not during the day. Early mornings are fun, too though. Lately, after Kyle’s gotten up for work I can sneak her into our bed and we finish out the night’s sleep together. Since she doesn’t sleep on me during the day anymore, I have to have a fix somewhere –and this one is working perfectly. This past Saturday morning, we heard talking from her crib at 7am. Neither Kyle nor I were ready to start the day. He brought her into our bed, and after kicking me in the ribs for 10 minutes she calmed down and actually fell back asleep for another hour! I woke up shortly before she did and got to watch her and her dad sleep. The coziest feeling just came over me – everything I ever needed or ever will need was in that bed. What a way to start a Saturday.

The little bug will be fifteen weeks old this week. She’s just truckin’ right along. Now that she has rolling out of the way, it seems that she has moved on to wanting to sit up like a big girl. If I put her on the couch or with pillows against her back she will bring herself forward a bit and steady herself for several seconds with her back unsupported. Of course, she will eventually fall forward or to the side, but I’m pretty impressed none the less. It’s definitely a start. She’s got one heck of a core on her – I’m a little jealous. Maybe if I do her workout of constant kicking and rolling I will get a strong core as well. That’s about it for the littlest Proebsting this week. Mobility sums up the week. Lord help us.

Your conversation is in regards to Kyle trying to give Leah a bottle while I went out shopping. Leah is not a fan of bottles.

Me: (After getting home) How’d she do?

Kyle: She screamed.

Me: Aww, she did? Why didn’t you call me, I would have come home and fed her.

Kyle: Well, she ended up eating a little. I had her in the bathroom with the fan on. And I tricked her into staring at the light bulb to distract her.

And as a bonus.

Me: Do we all want to go to Target or do you want to stay here with the bug?

Kyle: I’ll stay here, wiiiiith myself.

Me: Aaaand the bug.

Kyle: Aaaand myself.

Me: Aaaand youself with the bug.

Kyle: Aaaaand myself and myself.

Me: Okay, we’ll just see how this ends.

Kyle: I guess we will.

Needless to say, I went to Target by myself. Kyle stayed home with himself and the bug.

Six Years Ago Today...

Six years ago today I was a freshman in college. I was a sorority girl. I was a size two. My hair was cut to my ears. The Cardinals were playing post season baseball. I hate phrases like, “finding out who you are,” but I had absolutely no idea who I was or even what I liked and didn’t like. The only things I knew about myself were that I was a freshman in college and I was going to live.it.up.

But that all changed one night after going to one of Fulton’s classiest bars, Whiskey Wild. You might think that the living it up was just beginning after going to a bar, but that was not the case for me. As someone who absolutely did not want to date anyone right out of the gate in college, I had to get that idea out of my head. And fast.

Because there he was.

Now, I don’t remember much of the evening (interpret that how you will), but thank goodness I have my favorite memory locked in my brain. I saw him standing across the bar, him with a group of guys, me with a group of girls. He was wearing a brown and white striped American Eagle button up shirt, hair buzzed short, and holding a beer. It was not one of those made in the movies, love at first sight moments, but it was a man he’s hot moment. We met eyes for a second, and then went about doing our own thing. That was that. Lord knows I wasn’t going to go up and talk to him. Remember the girls I was with? Turns out, they knew him. As we made the rounds, one of them introduced us. He told me his name was Todd, and he played baseball at William Woods. And my goodness did Todd have pretty eyes! I never thought I was an “eye” girl until I saw those bad boys. We shared a dance. Which I hated. Not because of Todd, but because I hate dancing. Nor am I good at it. But I made it through. And afterwards his 19 year old self asked my 18 year old self if I wanted a drink. Ro-man-tic. And because my parents read this blog, I’ll leave my response unanswered.

And that’s it. We exchanged numbers and texted some throughout the night, but that was the extent of our meeting.  

The next morning I was talking to another sorority sister about our night. I told her I met a guy named Todd that played baseball at William Woods. She was a junior, and told me that she didn’t think there was a baseball player named Todd. I was completely confused, and absolutely sure I was correct on the name.

Let’s just say thank God for facebook. He added me as a friend, and what do you know – his name wasn’t Todd at all! Kyyyyle. As Lloyd Christmas would say, “I was way off!” Once the facebook relationship got going there was no stopping us. I tried my hardest to not get too attached, after all, I wanted to not get too caught up in a guy right off the bat. But I couldn’t help myself. Those eyes! I was stuck.

Our first “date” consisted of watching Anchorman in his room. Then I needed his help carving pumpkins for a party, and that turned into me watching him carve all of my pumpkins. Then we had a real first date – dinner and a movie. What movie? Oh, nothing too exciting, just Saw II. You remember I hate scary movies, right? I have always been terrified of them. Can’t watch previews, never watched ET because I coulnd’t make it past the first scene; it’s bad. But I couldn’t let Kyle know that, I didn’t want him to think I was some sort of baby. So I went, terrified. I watched it, terrified. And I stayed terrified for weeks! When Saw III came out and he asked if I wanted to go I filled him in on my secret. When he brought up the point that I saw the second one with him I was quick to explain that I liked him a lot more back then. For some reason he realllly wanted me to go. I told him if I was going I would close my eyes and ears for the entire movie. He said ok, he must have thought I was joking. I was not. I didn’t see or hear a second of that movie. And I will never watch another scary movie with him (or anyone) as long as I live.

One of his baseball buddies told me he only ate chicken strips early on. I laughed. I had no idea. And the amount of ketchup I have seen him eat over the years has to have broken some kind of record. I couldn’t marry a guy that only ate chicken strips, so we kicked that habit. And the ketchup has stayed, but I make him use the kind without corn syrup.

Early on, I would skip my classes to hang out with him. But then I realized something, he never skipped his. And he studied. Crap. I thought I was dating a baseball player, not a nerd. Turns out he was both. So after getting an awfully low GPA my first semester thanks to him, it never went below a 3.5 the rest of my time in college also thanks to him.

Speaking of baseball player, that was a new experience. I hated baseball. I had been to one Cardinals game in my life, and I swore I’d never go back. And now I figured he’d want me to watch him play. So I did. Every stinkin’ game he had. And he was a pitcher, so he didn’t even play every game. But I was there. The first game I ever saw was in Feburary, and it was sleeting. I was completely numb, but I actually had a good time. And it got more and more fun over the years. Without me knowing it he not only turned me into a baseball fan, but a Cardinals fan.

He aged me quite a bit after we met. Remember all of that living I wanted to do? Well, I never got around to it. I was too busy sleeping. I can probably count on one hand the number of times I went out after we started dating. I don’t think I’ll ever understand why. My two best theories are as follows: He gave me confidence to be comfortable with myself. Comfortable enough to know that I am not a partier even if it’s the cool thing to do. I stopped trying to fit in, and realized that I was much happier going to bed at 9. Or: I got the guy I wasn’t even looking for, I knew he was it, and I was ready to get on with life.

And get on with life we did. Six years later and we’re married. I am not a size two. My hair has grown. The Cardinals are still in post season play (whoop), and I’ve got a pretty good handle on “who I am.” I spent this day six years ago sleeping in, going to classes, getting ready, and going out to a bar. Today I spent it buying our family outfits for Christmas pictures, rocking our baby girl to sleep, cleaning spit up off the couch, and filing bills. Today was more fun.

Coincidentally, if you would have told me that night after I met Todd at the bar that in six years to the day our daughter would turn 14 weeks old I would have laughed in your face.

I’ve (I think we’ve) had a lot of fun over the past six years. And before you judge us for meeting in a bar, I think it’s fair to assume that God knew there was no way we were going to meet in a church. But I think He’s happy with how it all turned out.

And in the next several years we’ll have to get creative with the story to make it Leah appropriate.

This was his facebook picture back then. Do you see what I mean with the eyes?!

3 Months! 13 weeks, 14 weeks.

Sometimes I wonder if all parents like their kids as much as I like mine. She is seriously right up my ally. I could not have put together a funnier, sweeter, cuter, more energetic baby than the one I've got. Every day is something new with her, and every day she does something that makes me fall in love with her a little more.

I am seriously lacking in the blog department. But in my defense, we've been gone a lot the past couple of weeks. I'm hoping to get back on track this week, and stay that way! This one will encompass weeks 13 and 14. Which, by the way, blows my mind. Someday I'm sure I will be less amazed by how quickly she is growing up, but for now it's an every day thing. So much happens every single week! Leah spent her three month birthday, and week 13 in Poplar Bluff. I love taking her to the woods! She was so interested in my parents dog, Bella this time around. She loved to watch her move around, and especially liked to watch her tail wag. I can't wait until she's old enough to play with her! I always learn something new about Leah when I take her out of our everyday environment. I suppose it's because I'm forced to give up our daily routine, and we have new things to look at and new things to play with. This trip, I learned that Leah loves, loves, loves to take walks in her Bjorn... facing forward. I have put her in it several times around here, but always with her facing my chest. I read (which is precisely why I stopped reading) that babies like that and many will fall asleep as they're being carried around. Well, everytime I put my baby in it facing me... she licked me. Constantly. I would take her out and be sopping wet. And she was definitely not asleep. So I kind of gave up. However, grandma takes Bella for walks down the old gravel roads, and Leah and I wanted to join in the fun. There is no way a stroller is going down those roads, so I packed up the Bjorn. With her excellent head control, we decided to let her face forward and see what happened. And what happened? Well, Leah squealed, flapped her arms, kicked her legs, and talked the entire walk! She.loved.it. Of course she did, she could look around at everything and she wasn't strapped down like she is in a car seat! So from now on, anywhere I have to go, I'm strapping her to me.

Week 13, and almost 14 have brought on some seriously fun new things. The first, and biggest being... laughter! That's right, her big smiles with squeaks at the end turned into giggles!!! My mom was the first to get her to laugh, and I missed it! I was so bummed! However, this morning I have been practically tormenting her with tickles, silly faces, raspberries, and anything else I can think of to get a laugh of my own - and I got one!! It's the cutest, sweetest little giggle. Naturally, when I got the camera out to record it she went mute. But don't worry, I'll keep trying. She is also a lot more coordinated all of a sudden. She can get her favorite two fingers in her mouth and face them in the right direction! She has also started reaching for things. She almost killed herself in her bathtub last night. She decided she wanted to roll over in it. And that was that. We got a new one this morning. Not just because of the rolling though, I noticed last night that she had actually outgrown it! What three month old outgrows a bathtub?! Mine. Her butt didn't fit on the seat, and her head stuck up over the top. She couldn't get comfortable at all. I cannot wait to give her a bath tonight, her new tub quacks! Yes, quacks. I also packed up some of her "baby" toys and got out some of her "big girl" toys. She just seems to get so bored lately. Again, what three month old gets bored?! Mine. The rattles just aren't doing it for her anymore, so we got out some that were supposed to be for when she is six months. And of course, she loved them. Six month toys, six month clothes, a bathtub for a six month old - I swear if I didn't deliver her myself in July I would not believe she is only three months old. She also has a new trick when I'm trying to get her to go to sleep, and she's trying her hardest not to. She smiles. It's terrible!! She knows my weakness. When she would squirm and fight I could just hold her a little tighter or rock her a little harder. The smiles I can't do anything about... except laugh... which makes her smile more. I've had to resort to not looking at her. And if I do glance, she's staring at me with a smile ready for me to cave. She's pretty clever. She has also discovered her feet, and she is quite obsessed. She loves to watch them, and is trying desperately to figure out how to get them in her hands! She is still trying to roll over - someone help her! It's so pitiful, that darn shoulder!! And in swaddle news - she is a pro! Today was the first day I was really going to put my foot down with it, and what do you know, I didn't have to! She has gone to sleep without it three times without a hitch! She's so big! There may be a setback or two in our future, but for now I am more than pleased. She really loves to look at herself in the mirror these days. She talks and talks and gives herself big smiles - it's so sweet! And last but not least, I go back and forth on if she is getting a tooth or not?!?! I know it would be super early, but she's advanced. She gnaws on ev.ry.thing. and lately she has had a clear runny nose without being sick. I guess time will tell, but you better believe I pry her mouth open at least once a day to see if she's got one.

And in other Proebsting news... we're getting back to being healthy. Basically, I'm sick of hearing Kyle whine about gaining weight back after he lost it all. And really, I could stand to eat healthier. Sure, I'm losing weight, but my diet is absolutely shameful. When I was pregnant I ate healthier than I ever have in my life, and these days I'm just getting by. Shoving whatever's easiest in my mouth. So Leah and I went grocery shopping today and got all the foods the three of us used to eat (yes, Leah included... she ate what I ate). No more sweets, no more fast food, no more crap. Leah and I have gotten the hang of not eating dairy. Sure, it's not the most fun thing, but she is much better off and I can live without ice cream. And actually, I'm better off, too. I watch Kyle eat candy and ice cream and although I'd like some, I kind of like that I can't have it. I don't know when I'll introduce Leah to it again, if ever. Parts of me don't want to. What's the point? She is so much healthier without it. We shall see.

That about sums up our lives this week. Unfortunately, I don't have a conversation for you. Kyle and I haven't actually seen each other in a week besides last night. I'll keep my ears peeled for whatever comes out of our mouths this week. 

Little Buddy.

Well, it happened. I didn’t have time to do a weekly blog last week. I knew it would happen eventually. Sad, sad day. I really just wanted to get the birth story one out there, and we all saw how long that turned out to be. By the time I finished that one, I was totally out of juice.

Allow me to play a little catch up. Somebody turned twelve weeks last week. Twelve. Someone stop her! Actually, I’m okay with her growing up, because every week she gets a little more fun, and does something even funnier than the last week. I’m really enjoying her these days, more so than in the beginning. Is that bad of me to say? She’s just so interactive now, and we have so much fun together during the days – she’s my little buddy.

She still fights with her shoulder daily as she tries to get herself from her back to her belly. Man, she would like to be on the move. She talks so incredibly much. Somedays it’s nonstop from the second she wakes up. I love hearing everything she has to say, she has the sweetest little voice! She is figuring out how to suck her fingers, and it can’t come soon enough! Ever since we’ve been working on breaking the swaddle, I’ve been dying for her to get some fingers in her mouth to soothe herself. For the past month she has really just preferred her whole fist, but within the last week she has really started to settle on her first two on her left hand. A little more dexterity and she’ll have it! Speaking of non swaddling it’s going… okay. She did so great the first week, she was barely crying by the end of the week. Then for some reason she had a really tough couple of days last week, and then we went out of town so that made it worse, and we’re leaving again this week, so who knows what shape she’ll be in when we get back. I’ve decided not to push it too much this week, because I know after a trip to grandmas she won’t know how to sleep out of grandma’s arms and I’ll have to start over next week anyways. I actually don’t think the swaddle is her problem anymore, I think it’s those daily naps we take together. I think she is getting a little too used to sleeping on mom’s chest, so now when I put her in her cribs she gets super mad. But again, we’ll soak it in this week – cause next week I’m gonna have to get tough on her. And me. I like sleeping with her on me as much as she does. She’s so stinking cuddly. But I know that it is better in the long run for her to be able to get herself to sleep. Sigh. In more fun news, she loves her jumperoo! Sometimes she just sits in it and smiles. And sometimes she just sits in it and eats the side. But either way, she has the time of her life in there. I think she really enjoys being able to sit up and look around more than anything. She is getting better in the car. We really pushed her this past weekend taking her to Branson, but she did better than I thought. She didn’t cry the entire way, so I consider it a success. Usually when we just drive around St. Charles she will occupy herself well enough to not scream, and sometimes she even falls asleep in there now! She loves to lick us. Or anything. And last but not least, she has a new game now. If we go to kiss her big, fat cheeks, she quickly whips her head around with mouth wide open and practically eats our faces. Once, this ended in me kissing her right on the tongue.

Last week Leah and I had some errands to run. A trip to the DMV was in order, and what’s more fun than a trip to the DMV? A trip to the DMV with Leah. But, as it turns out – she was a gem! I found a little DMV in St. Charles that I don’t think anyone else knows about. There is never a line, and they always have five people working – it’s so nice! So although we didn’t have to wait in line, naturally, I didn’t have a tax receipt I needed. So the DMV trip turned into a trip to the county assessor, and unfortunately there was a huge line. I was a little nervous, but Leah was in such a good mood. She made best friends with the guy behind us and talked and smiled at him the entire 45 minutes we waited in line. And of course, everyone told her how cute she was which turned her into an even bigger ham. After that we had to go get four new tires. Luckily, I took it to Sears in the mall, so while we waited, we shopped. And again, she was such a gem. We have so much fun shopping together. She slept for about 30 minutes, and then just sat peacefully and watched everyone in the mall intently the rest of the time. She even let me eat at the food court! When we headed back to sears, we had about 20 minutes to wait, so I took her out of her car seat and held her. She quickly made another friend in this sweet older lady across from us. The lady was absolutely in love, and jumped at the chance to hold her while I paid for everything. I never thought I’d hand my baby to a stranger, but this lady was super sweet, and Leah just kept smiling. And it’s not like I was going far. They had a lot of fun together. And as a bonus, Leah came back to me smelling like an entire bottle of perfume had been dumped on her.

I did something pretty scary last week. I unsubscribed to every single pregnancy and parenting email I have ever signed up for. They just don’t fit my baby. I don’t know where all you people get your babies, but mine did not come from the same place. Everytime I would get one of these emails, and try to shape Leah into what it said she should be doing, we both ended up very stressed out. When I started signing up for them, I was so excited to have some things to read to try and guide me through this, but as I have learned, Leah doesn’t follow any of the normal baby rules. We are both much happier when I just tune into her and stop trying to make her like all of the other babies out there. She is her own breed to say the least – and in my opinion, the better breed than all the other babies :). In other news, I’m eating better! Yes! I actually had breakfast, lunch, AND dinner three days straight last week! Three whole days! It was pretty refreshing. Three days is a start, someday I’ll make it all seven. In weight news though, it keeps coming off. I am now one pound away from where I was when I met Kyle, my freshmen year of college, six years ago. That’s kind of fun, but it also means I need some new pants! Who needs diet and exercise when you have a Leah around?

I think I better wrap this up. In a few days I have to write another one.

Here is your conversation:

(Kyle and I are lying in bed, and hear Leah bleat. Kyle starts to get up…)

Me: Just wait, let’s see if she can get herself back to sleep

Kyle: But won't she start getting frantic? She's just gonna cry.

Me: Okay, just do what your gut tells you

Kyle: Ugh. But I don’t have a gut. You’re my gut.