I just can't take it anymore. I know that I put up random status' about this man's dreams, and jump at the chance to tell someone - but it goes beyond that now. Kyle's dreams need a blog. They actually need a blog of their own, but I don't have that kind of time so I will just slip one in today highlighting my favorites. He is a very expressive sleep talker, and the other night he finally did it... he became a sleep walker.
The Karate Chop.
This was the first. The one where I thought to myself, just what am I getting into. The one where I was terrified for my life, only to start cracking up when I knew what was going on. We were sleeping (this is how they all begin), and all of a sudden I start to hear rumblings. I've learned to be thankful for these rumblings because they wake me up, and get me ready for what's to come. About 10 seconds after the mumbling, he yells (loudly), "I'm gonna karate chop that!!!" I was freaked. Not only did he yell those words he had his hands in the air in the correct "karate chop" position. Me, being an amateur at dealing with a sleep talker asked him, "what?" When I got no response I asked, "What's wrong, what are you doing?" Nothing. Then I put it all together and laid there for about 20 minutes laughing.
The Caterpillar.
With this one, I had had practice before. But it still freaked me out. We were sleeping, and the rumblings started. I get excited now when I hear this and try really hard to wake myself up enough to know what's going on so I can remember and tell him in the morning. So he's rumbling, then he sits up. Knowing he won't answer, but still curious I ask, "what are you doing?" Of course no response. However, he does say, "what is that?!" Ok, that kinda freaked me out. No one wants to hear that at 2am. So I play along and say, "what is what?" He gets angry and yells, "what is that on the wall?" "what is it?" "it's going up the wall." Knowing there is nothing, but a little spooked I look at the wall... nothing. Before I could tell him nothing, he laid back down and was sleeping soundly. I asked him about this one in the morning, he remember the dream exactly and told me there was a giant caterpillar crawling up the wall.
The Red Fruit Roll-up.
This one is short, sweet, and hilarious. I should preface by saying, we don't have fruit roll-ups in the house, and I've never seen him eat one. Nevertheless, the rumbling started and I woke up ready for action. With very little warning he gets right to the yelling. "Give me the fruit roll up!" "I had a red fruit roll up, give it to me!!" "That red fruit roll up!!!!!" Now for this one I was literally cracking up. Poor guy, someone had take his read fruit roll up.
The Dog.
This one was sweet. The rumblings began, but talking didn't follow. Kissing noises did. Kissing noises, followed by clapping and patting his legs. As if calling a dog. He didn't make actual words in this one, he mumbled a lot, but I could never really make anything out. Lots of calling to a dog or puppy though. Hands in the air clapping. It was great. Unfortunately he didn't remember in the morning.
Sleep Walking.
This happened two nights ago. The rumbling began. I got excited, and got myself alert. He sat up (that's when you know it's going to be good). He sat there for a while without doing anything, so I thought maybe he was actually awake. So I asked if he was ok. No response. Then the yelling started. "I'm still sitting!" "We're sitting!" "I'm sitting!!!" And on and on and on about sitting. I don't know if someone was taking his seat, or someone was making him get up or what... but he was not a happy camper. And he made sure to let everyone know he was still sitting! Then, the strangest thing happened. He got out of bed! Of course I tried to say something to him, but got no answer. He got his phone. Turned it on to use it as a flashlight. He was looking all over the floor for something. Finally found it, it was the remote. He takes the remote over to our UVerse box by the tv. Puts it on its side in front of the little green light to cover it up. Walks back to bed, and is sleeping soundly in less than 5 seconds. Meanwhile I lay there wondering what in the world just happened. God help me if he ever tries to walk further... I can't stop him. Are you even supposed to? I've heard its dangerous if you do, but we have stairs and I feel like sleep walking down stairs could be just as dangerous.
So there you have it. This man is an insane sleeper with the most vivid dreams! It definitely keeps me entertained. There are many more, I could probably write a book. I am dying to find a motion or voice sensitive recorder so that I can share all of this with everyone, but have yet to find one. For now, you will just have to believe me. I can't make this stuff up.
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